Connections

Just finished an  hour long conversation with a former colleague.  It was meant to be a quick tete a tete  to get some career advice but turned into a  fun conversation about everything under the sun. I hadn't spoken to her in a while and she now lives in Colorado- so I was hesitant, and frankly afraid of intruding on her time as she is quite senior to me. But in the absence of anyone else to turn to, I decided to take a risk and text her. Surprisingly she responded almost immediately and didn't just give me advice but also shared some of her similar struggles. The connection was immediate and meaningful.

I think all of us yearn for meaningful connections and sometimes it's a just a matter of overcoming that initial hesitation and reaching out to another person. You will be surprised at where it may lead you and what new friendships you may discover.

Lens

Today, I got to see a part of Mumbai I lived in a few years ago, through the eyes of another person and suddenly it was transformed! From a dusty, crowded, loud space which I  never really considered home, it became a treasure trove of life experiences, sweet childhood memories and lasting bonds between families.

Ratna Pathak- a well known Indian actress and theater personality- grew up in Dadar, Mumbai, and a show on Netflix recently took her down memory lane. With the host she visited the house she grew up in, the parks in Dadar she frequented with friends, and the restaurants she ate at. And as she spoke, she brought that whole place to life with tales from the past. I found myself drawn into her narrative and yearning to go back and see it all just once more. To touch it, feel it, and breathe it- the way she had. That is the power of a new perspective and that is the power of a good storyteller.

Thanks Ms. Pathak for a brief but wonderful encounter with a familiar place, made new through your lens.

Alone

Does not necessarily mean lonely and I am relishing the discovery! Having packed hubby and sunny boy off to India for a month, I am by myself after a long time. There are plenty of plans and aspirations. Mostly around what I know to be un-achievable spiritual discovery and weight loss goals. But whether I do it all, or just some, or maybe none- it is refreshing for the soul to just be.

Role model

When I was twenty years old, If someone had told me that one day I would need to be the primary daily "bread winner" for my family, I would have laughed at them in the face. That just wasn't something I was  set up for. It wasn't what I was brought up to be. But the fact that at the end of this week I will get my first pay check when no other new income is going to come in, is a pretty incredible thing to happen to me.

You see in my family its not just that the women are not expected to work, in many cases they are simply not permitted to work. So growing up I had no role models of working women, working mothers or households where women took on the role of the primary earner. So as I go down this journey I am going to have to write my own rules, create my own guide posts, and set my own measures for success and failure.

But I would be lying if I said that this does not scare me. While I have taken on this new role, many of the conventional roles have held on. For various reasons I am still going to be the primary care giver and home maker . One of  the reasons being that those are the only roles I know to do with absolute certainty. Almost all my female role models growing up were stay at home mothers or at the most teachers, who in my mind were just extensions of a mother. So on most days the part of me I am most sure of, nimble footed at, are being the mother and the person who runs the household.

However my journey has to have a meaning. Maybe this is a journey to create a new role model for all the girls who  like me have been brought up on the notion that their primary role was to bring up the children, take care of the house and support the man as he went out to earn. When they see me I hope they can realize that life is unpredictable. The best thing you can do for yourself is to get an education, learn a skill and get the qualifications that will set you up to earn a living. Role model or no role model, you may have to step up to the task and simply put, its just easier when you are prepared.

Cosby vs Huxtable

The conviction of Bill Cosby is painful and for many it has left them with a huge sense of loss- the loss of a dear character who not only entertained, but educated, and provided a role model for many young African American men.

To all those who are feeling this loss I say- do not confuse Dr. Huxtable for Bill Cosby. Dr. Huxtable cherished and respected his family and would never have misused his position of power and influence to abuse a woman. So keep your eye on the character and do not let the actor overpower its charm.

Yes the conviction of Bill Cosby is painful and in many ways it is a time to mourn- but it is also a time to rejoice. Rejoice in the knowledge that justice was served, a woman's voice was heard and the truth was victorious. Today Bill Cosby maybe in jail but the spirit of Dr. Huxtable and his family lives on- and that is what should inspire the next generation of men.

60 Degrees

So what can a sixty degree day mean? If the opportunity is ceased, a sixty degree day can mean an evening of shooting hoops, idol chatting, a walk in the park, and story telling. It was a wonderful half hour in the park with my favorite guy and the weather was perfect for it.

This sort of an impromptu break can cleanse the soul and rejuvenate your energy. So I vow to do this more often as the weather turns and hopefully by the time winter comes around again (because come it will) I would have stored away my treasure of sunshine for those dark bleak days.

Thank God for spring. Thanks God for sixty degree days!

Elevate

Just last week I met someone at the newly opened coffee shop in town. Surrounded by the heady aroma of the brew and the morning hum drum of lattes and mochas, I was struck by how packaging and branding had elevated something as simple as coffee. Coming from a region of India where most people still start the day with warm milk or tea prepared in the humble home kitchen, the rise of the coffee to such international fame still manages to amaze me.

The lesson to be learnt here is that there is money to be made when something can be made complex, branded, packaged and mystified. Twenty years ago there was just coffee and then came decaf, today your morning cuppa is as complex as you want it to be and your relationship with your barista  something to be thoughtful of.

Drinking coffee is no longer about getting your morning caffeine. It is now a whole experience and a statement of who you are. If you favor Starbucks you are playing it safe and willing to pay a premium for the guarantee of predictable taste. But if you are a true pioneer, you will be seen frequenting the one off boutique coffee shop in town run by the local couple who use burlap at every chance they can, probably diffuse essential oils at home, and in the name of being local have taken on a lifelong struggle.

Whatever your passion or style, coffee is no longer just coffee. When you order that non-fat, extra hot latte with soy milk and stevia leaf sweetener and refill your battered travel cup, you are buying something that appeals as much to your soul as to your taste buds.